Happy Easter to all.... It is a lot easier to have a good holiday when you arent constantly being reminded that someone in your family is missing. It is days like today that facebook becomes a monster, not like I wouldn't do the same if it wasn't for our situation, but all the family and kid pictures of the happy families in all their Easter outfits is just blehhhhhhh. I think this year is especially hard because it was only a year ago we were celebrating with our bundle of joy and we were so thankful that we had her with us and we were waiting to go home and start our lives together and now it is all gone, that life I pictured is gone, and now I get to sit back and watch other families living the life I feel like I should have had. Especially holidays simply suck. I don't like to be or mean to be this huge downer and make anyone else feel bad that they may be doing insensitive things, but these are honest feelings that I am sure every parent who has lost a child feels. It is very unfair that instead of getting to dress my baby, I get to decorate her grave side, can you picture what that is like? It isn't fun, at least not for me, it is heartbreaking and painful. I have to say I am surprised at how difficult this Easter has been, I didn't expect it to be difficult, but many times today I had to push back the tears and suck it up. But never the less, we had a fine day with family, good food, and nice enough weather to be outside and walk! At least we had that.
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