Thursday, August 4, 2016

5 year old

Today May is 5 years old!!! It is unbelievable how fast time goes and that she can already be 5!! It is super depressing.. Do all parents feel like this as their kids age? I guess another reason to not have anymore kids! Having her was a completely different experience than lua and sol, obviously. She made me a mom and every day she is still teaching me how to be a mom. I can't even express how badly I wish i could have had the same experiences with lua and sol that I did with may. We had challenges but watching this little baby grow and learn the way she has, has been amazing. I miss her baby days soooooo much. I know I wrote before about how seeing other babies and families with babies bum me out, but really looking back at Mays baby pictures and videos, make me the most depressed. How much fun we had with May as a baby was a great selling point in having another child even though we were really on the fence about it. I miss those days. But have to look forward and not at the past I suppose and hope for another amazing 5+ years with her.
We are currently still in the hospital with sol and his stomach bug and may is at the grandparents house. I had planned to take her to the mall and do play and shopping today, but plans change :( I'm really sad I'm not with her right now to give her a great day, but she will probably have more fun with grandma anyway. We have a party planned on Saturday for miss may, and I'm hoping so badly we will still be able to do it. I hope we will be able to get out of here today, but who knows what will happen.
happy birthday may! My first baby! I love you my little 5 year old!


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